Ooo, more

[callistra]

"She was mad from the conversation with her friend Penelope who all the men seemed to be attracted to. Her cheeks were flaming red fires like a volcano ready to explode through the cold emerald stones that were her eyes. She knew Penelope thought she drank too much."

Comments

Here's my favorite:

[laughingimp.livejournal.com]

"Isadore knocked once at the door, and then it at once swung open. The stunning vision inside, an echo of pulchritude in a bright red dress, seemed to take their breath away, it was Penelope Urbain, Bruce Lucent’s longtime and very beautiful girlfriends. Penelope, who had walked in the door of Lucent Software, asking for a job, and a good thing is being that she did, because he had one for her, a position, so to speak, that only a beautiful woman could fulfill, and she filled the role perfectly, as the beautiful girlfriend for those social occasions when he needed to appear on the front page of the newspaper with a beautiful woman on his arm. Everyone looked and thought he was lucky, but it wasn’t just luck it was planning that he fell in love with this beautiful woman and her with him. He gave her his glance and she gave him hers."

It takes skill and diligence to write something as thoroughly awful as this.