Breast Feeding

[callistra]

The worst thing at the moment is not knowing what is going on. Sometimes, I try and make myself lactate a little, just to make sure I am still producing *something*. he keeps screaming when I try to feed him, and usually he is happy to take the top ups the doc recommend. It makes me feel low, because I feel mean making him scream and cry for all that time while I try and breast feed. I know, that sometime last night we had a perfect, 15 minutes on each side, sucking continuously, quiet and happy feed. But at the moment, I can't remember what it was like, and it makes me cry. We're sleep depriced, last night I got home late because of a scrapbooking thing, and couldn't sleep, so I got up and had a hot shower and then went and cleaned up the kitchen and then pawed through my packets (half asian, half maggi) to think about what I could cook for today. Then, at 4, we had the next feed - that must have been the good one. Half an hour, did not want any top up. I then spend the next half an hour in the kitchen with john making up little bottles to cover today. We're still getting the hang of this formula thing.
:-(
I have to go - I am sure he is hungry. I don't like the self doubt - is he crying because he is hungry? So I try to feed him, and he screams more. But is that because he doesn't want the breast, but does want formula? Why doesn't he feed like he used to? Why has it suddenly become too hard/not interesting/not wanted? I feel sad because he is crying and feel sad because he doesn't want me any more.
:-(
But he just doesn't seem to want it. He had so little from me sometimes last night that I felt engorged for the first time since in hospital.

Comments

[mynxii.livejournal.com]

i'm so sorry :( i have no idea what you're going through, i wish i could offer some help, but really don't know what i can offer... if there is anything, let me know...

*cuddles*

[callistra.livejournal.com]

Would you like to come over and vacuum? *grin* Doing anything tomorrow? I can promise lunch in return...

[mynxii.livejournal.com]

sunday is more likely? i'm away tonight and will have to go home and do stuff tomorrow but sunday morning i could come up and vaccuum for you... i possibly have to go into work sat or sunday afternoon so i can make that saturday afternoon after getting home and sorting house stuff - does that work?

summary:

out tonight, so home tomorrow morning to do my own house stuff, will go into work tomorrow afternoon and go do stuff for you on sunday morning while K is training - does that work?

*cuddles*

[tiberius-n.livejournal.com]

I guess being a little boy and not being able to communicate makes it very hard for you. Take care and be patient.

[telaryn.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Wish I'd seen this post before I was heading out the door.

First and foremost: whatever amount of water you're drinking -- increase it. You have to drink an insane amount of water to produce the breast milk necessary to nurse a child full time.

Second: as long as you continue to stress/beat yourself up about it, you're creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. I have both been there and done that. Stress inhibits milk production. Not having enough milk to quiet the baby creates stress.

Lather, rince, repeat.

Third: Babies cry. And no one who's experienced motherhood expects you to telepathically intuit what those cries mean. Eventually you'll figure it out with some reliability, but honey your hormones are playing ping pong with your brain right now.

Take it easy on yourself. We've all been there.

My short term advice is, believe it or not, have a beer. Guiness, preferably. One Guiness a day will help your milk production nutrition wise, as well as calming both you and the baby down.

Keep at it. Anyone who thinks breast-feeding is some sort of natural instinct that kicks in for Moms and babies when the kid is born has never tried it.

[http://users.livejournal.com/doctor_k_/]

Third: Babies cry.

Indeed. They're not able to do much else. They feed, poo, wee, sleep, breathe, wriggle and cry. Not much to choose from to entertain themselves, huh? Imagine if _you_ couldn't talk...

A work colleague last night was relating how he and his wife used to beat themselves up all the time about doing this or not doing that and not knowing what was making the baby cry, but when they took a step back, and realised the baby crying was independent of what they were doing, life suddenly got a lot easier.

Is Vincent around 7 weeks old? That always seems to be crisis point for new parents re sleep deprivation and baby crying.

[callistra.livejournal.com]

He will be nine week on Tuesday. Er, today is Friday? So 8.5 weeks right now?

:-)

I just find it annoying that I no longer trust my guess as to his crying jags - I know they just cry, we do the usual: is he wet/pooey/hungry/col/hot and then just hold him and let him get it out. But now I freak every time and wonder if he is hungry. Plus if we are trying to feed, and it's been four hours since last time, and I know he's hungry but he just doesn't want to play...

[callistra.livejournal.com]

Yeah, thanks for that. Yesterday was also the day on which the night before was our worst for sleep, so hence the sleep deprived depression. I slept in this morning, and that's helped.

I'm drinking between one - two litres of water a day, plus teas and coffees. Any more, and between the toilet and him, I won't be moving far at all!

I know I have milk supply - Elaine did a brilliant job talking to me about it, and I seem to have full resevoirs when needed. I'm also trying to prep my breasts before letting him latch, so that he is getting milk ASAP. Sometimes he's happy, sometimes he's not.

And yes, I need to calm down and stress less. This week has been shocking. I need more fresh vegies - they are in the fridge waiting for me... but it takes time to prep, and I just haven't had time, so have been hitting the carbs a bit too much, pasta and etc, which makes it harder the next day. But tomorrow is the weekend, and that's the time when everything gets sorted and re-organized and re-evaluated and re-prioritised.
:-)

And it's great , the amount of help offered. I'm also reading an email from my frugalaussies list where I mentioned some of my propblems and someone has written me a 400 word email to try and help!

[lilysea.livejournal.com]

*hugs* *sympathies* good luck!

I know nothing about babies, but for your stress, I wonder if chamomile tea/peppermint tea could be relaxing? Also evaporating lavender essential oil in an aromatherapy burner can be soothing.

Someone's probably already mentioned it, but the
Australian Breastfeeding Association has a Breast Feeding Helpline (08) 9340 1200

I seem to remember reading that there's a sleep clinic in Perth for parents whose babies don't sleep through the night, thought I'm guessing it's for 12-month olds or older. Don't remember the name, sorry!

[callistra.livejournal.com]

I'm scared of the ABA. From what I have seen, they put a whole meaning to the words "militant".
:-)

Actually, we bath Vincent in this wonderful stuff Lee and Lyn bought us, which has lavendar and chamomile in it. It's great and he smells so good afterwards!!

[callistra.livejournal.com]

Oh, and Ngala. The place is called Ngala. He's actually really really really good at sleeping, especially for a new born. We have our patterns already, but it just gets disturbed once in a while and it takes a few hours to get him back to bed. Plus the scrapbooking party seemed to go on forever! Although we did enjoy it.

[splanky.livejournal.com]

My sis was telling my Ngala has a helpline which she has found very useful, including for breastfeeding problems. They don't just do sleep, they have lactation experts there too. You probably already know all this though.

[meljane.livejournal.com]

Ok this is most probably a stupid question , but have you had you breast milk tested ?

Is it it cool if I drop round today ?

[callistra.livejournal.com]

Tested for what?
Can you do that? We've given some of Vincent's wee and blood for testing; I am sure if we could test milk Dr would have suggested it.
:-)

[meljane.livejournal.com]

There was a story of a woman who had trouble with breast feeding and they tested her milk and it had an enormous salt content which is why her baby kept rejecting her breast milk .

It doesn't hurt to ask the next time you go in , if things don't pick up .

[chaosmanor.livejournal.com]

Hmm, easy to tell by taste. Breat milk tastes sweet and watery, nothing at all like cow's milk, so any salt will be immediately obvious by taste.

[meljane.livejournal.com]

I wasn't saying the breast milk that Calli has may have a high salt content but maybe there may be something in the milk that Vincent doesn't agree with (I was just using that lady as an example of someone that had their breat milk tested) .

[illiadic.livejournal.com]

telaryn has good advice. Give yourselves more time. Try not to pack too much into a day. Do not try and be superwoman at this stage. Have a comfy place to feed. Cuddle when not feeding.

One of mine had thrush and I had to paint the inside of her mouth with Genitan Violet (I think that is how you spell it) and put cream on my nipples (which was washed off before feeding).

Another use to get colic (wind) (could have been older than 7wks though)usually about dinner time when I was trying to cook. Gripe water helped a little and so did tummy rubs and cuddles.

Babies cry. There are a few things to check. Clean nappy, nappy rash (use zinc and castor oil cream from chemist)comfortable clothing, too hot, too cold, needs a cuddle, frightened by a noise or unexpected movement (cuddle) hungry.

It could be that your milk is not coming out fast enough (try stroking your brest down towards your nipple as you feed like you do when expressing milk). It could be that too much milk is comming out and he is choking (try a different position - lying on your side).

While I was in hospital I was getting so little sleep that they got me to express my milk and put it in a bottle so I could sleep through one night at least and the nursing staff fed baby. This may be a way to do things then you can see how much milk he is taking. You should be able to get a brest pump from the hospital. Make sure you sterilize everything though.

These are just some ideas. I also found the people at the child health services State Child Development Centre Rheola St. W. Perth 9426 9444 useful.

You will get all sorts of ideas from all over the place some will work and some won't. Different things work for different mothers and babies. Keep talking to people until you find what works for you.

I was spaced for a while too. Just make the time to get to know each other and to hell with the house work, even the meals if you have to. Tell the man in your life how important he is and how much you love him, and you will be back on track soon but you need to understand this helpless little person so that life can get back to some form of normality. So not to get jealous if you spend a lot of time with the baby and family group hugs are a good thing too.
Hope there is something here that helps
*hugs*

[callistra.livejournal.com]

I tried to hire an electric breastpump, when we were at the hospital they had one and it was so easy! I have a manual one, but I'm not happy with it - not sure if it's useless, I'm useless at using it, or if I just get bored too soon. :-)

But I am thinking of trying to hire one again. I did hire one, but it was useless so I'm worried that maybe it's just me and it's difficult. Although, the one I hired was missing everything except the pump itself, and you had to have the hand pump which I did have, to try and clip it in place. It was a kludge, and it didn't work well, and then didn't work at all in the end.

Yep, Elaine covered the stroking downwards, and also explained how nipple stimulation will increase the oxytocin in your syste, so that by the next feed, you will have MUCH more milk, depending on the amount of stimulation. This has been what caused a couple of the squirting accidents. :-)

One positive I can see with the occasional formula is that one day soon I might be able to get 8 hours straight sleep. Just once, would be nice. :-) I got lots of sleep last night, we were in bed by 9, and then John let me sleep in this morning when Vincent was wide awake between 4:30am - 8:00am, (he had a BIG wee which woke him up too thoroughly) and then managed to sleep until 10 this morning, so I'm feeling much more able to cope. :-)

I think I have been pushing it a bit when it comes to trying to cook lunch and dinner and have them done by certain times. There is more leeway with the dinners, since John is home all night, but lunches he has a very specific time, once he has left work. And it's often in the 15 minutes between him leaving and getting here that something goes wrong/vincent needs food/whatever. :-) And I have run out of bread and cheese. *grin* Will fix that, probably tomorrow. I just need to step back occasionally and make sure that problems I have now can be coped with/dealt with next time.

I might give that phone number a ring.

[illiadic.livejournal.com]

just had a funny memory. When I did get the brest feeding thing sorted youngster was happily sucking away and i called hubby over for a look. He got reasonably close and i popped the nipple out of her mouth, gave the boob a bit of a squeeze and got him in the eye. Chuckle chuckle

[callistra.livejournal.com]

LOL
Vincent has worn breastmilk in the eye once, and yesterday it squirted all over his head *giggle*

[illiadic.livejournal.com]

LOL
Babies get use to it but I got hubby in the eye! *evil laugh*

[chaosmanor.livejournal.com]

Excellent! If you're squirting like that, it means the let-down process is working well. That's how it's supposed to be, far too much breast milk, drowning baby, palpable changes in your breasts between feeds.

[callistra.livejournal.com]

I'm now wondering if perhaps I have ovulated. Mum made a comment today about my bro not wanting to be BF any more, and then she found out she was pregnant. That reminded me of comments from another mum I know, who when she ran into this sort of trouble, tested her own saliva, and worked out that yes, she had ovulated. Ovulating changes the mucous in your body after all, and there have been changes in recent areas over the last few days.

Far fetched, I know, but *shrug*
:-)

[callistra.livejournal.com]

Scratch that last suggestion, he is fine drinking the breast milk when I express it and hand it to him in a bottle. I expressed 25 mLs today, about 10 of which was with a bowl and by hand. I was amused, I haven't consistently made myself squirt like that before.

I was a bit full though; he has pretty much refused the breast all day long. :-( Tomorrow, I'm checking out an electric breast pump, and buying some guiness!

[livelurker.livejournal.com]

I believe the electronic breast pumps they hire from St. John Of God are based on the UWA lactation research and are pretty good at getting the most out of you.

(Many years ago I worked on a leg ulcer measurement project that had spun off from a breast volume measurement project at UWA. How's that for being born under a bad sign? :)

Aside from the cry/sleep/eat/poo cycle, there's also teething as a consideration in why kids might be crying. But I think 9 weeks is probably a bit early for that (frequently it's also accompanied by flushed cheeks and a change in stool consistency (or dare I say it, smell)).

Sometimes you just tick all the checkboxes (feed them, change them, sleep them, hug them) on the list and still they cry. The only real solution is earplugs and the belief that just maybe they'll have to stop and catch their breath sometime before they turn 18 :) How is it that their throats don't explode? How do they achieve such a high noise to weight ratio?

Guinness, is there any problem it cannot solve?

Beware also that caffeinated drinks like tea, coffee, coke etc. will dehydrate you, so you actually need to drink more water if you're drinking them. Also, what you eat may change how your breast milk tastes. So if he's off the feed after a big chilli night that might be one consideration.